Opportunities

As I lie in this bed in an apartment in Krakow, Poland, I can't help but think of how lucky I am to be here. I think the rain makes me reflective. The soft patter of a gentle rain on this top floor apartment has me thinking about a lot. Of course - being so close to Auschwitz - I think of how lucky I am to have been born in a time and place where I am free. I have never had to fight for my freedoms or my life, and I think that's easy to overlook. It's easy to forget how lucky I am to have born in a beautiful place like Thousand Oaks, with a beautiful family like mine.  

Today is Mother's Day, yet another reason to reflect, and I can honestly say that I am so incredibly grateful to have been born to my mother. My mom is one of those people who just makes friends. I've never seen her burn a bridge or end a friendship. She just loves. She has shown me how to love - how to build connections and how to keep them. She has raised three pretty great kids (if I do say so myself) and each of us has a little bit of her. Vinnie rambles the way our mom does, picking up conversations in the middle, after he's started them with himself. Gerard loves more openly and more honestly than anyone I've ever met. And I, well, I look like our mom and I talk like our mom and I'm a little weird like our mom. We share a similar sense of humor, and I know in about 30 years, I will practically be my mother. This is something that I am very grateful for because if I someday can give my children the courage to traveland the   opportunity to study abroad, then I'll have done something right. I know that my mother has sacrificed in order to give me the things that I want, and for that I am grateful. Realizing that a human being in the world loves me so much they are willing to put themselves second, feels pretty incredible. That's what it is - pretty incredible. The love between me and my mother, the opportunities I've had to travel, the way things fall into place - pretty incredible.    

And then there were two....

I know I've been very bad at updating this blog of mine, but I guess lately I've been busy trying to soak in the last moments with my study abroad friends before we all had to say goodbye. Starting April, just three days after returning from Amsterdam, I had to say goodbye to Carolyn - the friend I'd seem the world with. Then just three days ago I had to say goodbye to Markelle - a friend I connected with more quickly than anyone in my life. And then this morning, I had to say goodbye to Erin - the friend I have had the pleasure of living with for these last four months. Of course there were other goodbyes along the way, other see-you-later's and it's-been-fun's, but saying goodbye to these three has been the hardest. I've written before about how I truly believe people come into your life for a reason, and I know that each of these three ladies were brought into my life for their own reason. I will cherish the laughs we have shared and the memories we have built, but it is still hard to say goodbye. Sure, we're all going back to America, but America is a big country. These friends I've made are scattered all over the country, so it will be hard to keep in touch. I believe we will, but we'll never have the same experience as our time shared living in the Niland House in Galway, Ireland. 

I guess that's life, though - a string of missing things. Here in Ireland, I miss home; at home, I will miss Ireland. I will miss going to formal tea at Cupan Tae. I will miss being able to walk to the beaches of salt hill to clear my head. I will miss the Quays, and being able to order a drink and just enjoy the company of my friends. I will miss bopping around the shops of shop street, spending too much money on souvenirs. But most importantly, I will miss being able to burst into Erin's room and demand she come out with me; being able to walk down the stairs to watch a movie with Markelle; being able to call Carolyn and say "come hang out with me." I will miss the ease with which I could see my friends. 

Now, I suppose, I'll just have an excuse to see parts of my country I've never seen before because as Erin walked out our door this morning, I realized, it's down to two - just me and Chelsea.